Geez! Like I'd tell you stuff like that...

Actual telephone conversation with Mozzy:

FG: Hubs is off today for Blaine's thingy.

Moz: Oh, so he's home now?

FG: Uh-Huh. In fact, I need to buzz his head before we go to this thing.

Moz: Well, what you and your husband do is really not my business, FG.

FG: You thought I meant blowjob, didn't you, Mom? I meant give him a haircut. Geez! Like I'd tell you stuff like that...

(Hubs is listening to the conversation...doing that silent "I think I'm gonna shit my pants" laugh.)