Scared To Death

I have a crippling fear.

Of lawn mowers. *

I am deathly afraid of the spinning blade. It could chop off my feet! It could hit a rock, ricocheting it into my skull, leaving me in a coma! I could succumb to carbon minoxide poisoning, gagging on fumes as I trail behind the beast! I could burn myself on the exhaust! They are loud, I may not hear warnings of my doom until it is too late!

I have made my fear known to those who love me. They all think I am pathetic, sad and unreasonable.

I have gone my ENTIRE LIFE without EVER ONCE mowing even a single blade of grass....

Who's pathetic now?! * *





*not really.
**suckas!