With fingernails that shine like justice...

and a voice that is dark like tinted glass, she is fast, thorough and sharp as a tack. She is touring the facility and picking up slack...

Monday, February 26, 2007

Conversation on a couch

I'm curled up at one end of the couch. Hubs is stretched out, reclining on the other end, his feet resting against my thighs. We are watching No Resevations. I fucking ♥ Anthony Bourdain.

Hubs gently pushes me with his feet, nudges me.

I ignore him, thinking he's adjusting, to get more comfy.

nudge, nudge.

There it is again. I continue to ignore him.


What?! Why are you doing that?!

Hubs grins.

What.ever.dude. I roll my eyes and continue watching TV.


What??!! What the fuck do you want??!!

Nothin'. I just like watching your boobs jiggle when I do that.

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Whats the coolest thing you did this weekend?

I named a rollergirl...

Aimee T. VilHorror.

You may now bask in my rollergirl naming greatness.

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Saturday, February 24, 2007


Our New Logo!!!!

Friday, February 23, 2007

The Widower

Roller Derby seems to have taken over my life. But in a good way. Except for one thing...Hubs, who was SO into me doing it at first, has now started calling himself a "Derby Widower". Funny how he forgets about the widow I once was. He'll go back to thinking its cool when we start bouting and he can point and say "That's MY WIFE."

I've been working on a fundraiser for the league. Let me know what you think...

I contacted the local Harley dealership and asked if they knew anything about setting up a poker run...I thought it might be a cool idea for a derby benefit. The guy on the other end got all excited and was more than eager to help us. They have offered the use of their facility, which includes, a BBQ, outdoor tables and an outdoor stage. They will DONATE all the food(burgers and hotdogs) and sodas!! We will ask for a donation of $3 for a hotdog and coke....and we get to keep all the proceeds!! One of the derby girls' dad is in a ZZTop tribute band, and they have offered to play the event for free. All of this is in addition to the poker run, which will have a $20 entry fee...we're doing a 50/50...that means half goes to prizes, and half to us! Isn't it amazing what can come from a single phone call and a question?

We figure it will make so much, that we've decided to include a charity in the event. We will be donating a portion of all proceeds to The Seattle Cancer Care Alliance at Children's Hospital. It can't hurt to improve the image of roller derby. There a lots of people out there who don't recognize it as a legitimate sport. Some people actually think its just a catfight on wheels, by skating whores in fishnets. Idiots.

Another good thing came from that call. Erin, the receptionist that answered the phone, was the first to field my question....which she countered with tons of her own. After we talked, I invited her to join us at practice that night. She showed up and was awesome! This chick can fucking skate. She's gonna be a huge asset to the league.

Well, I'm off to do laundry...of sorts. I'm gonna try and wash all my derby pads...they smell putrid. Luckily, I don't have practice again until Sunday, so they will have plenty of time to air dry. I'm putting my helmet in the top of the dishwasher for cleaning. It stinks pretty bad, too. Hopefully that will work. At this point, its clean it or buy a new one....because I don't think I could put it on my head again without gagging.

I haven't weighed myself since I posted about the inadvertent weight loss, but I'm confident that I've shed a few more....I'm trying to resist the urge to get on the scale and check. Maybe I'll have a cookie instead.

Kidding, of course.

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Wednesday, February 14, 2007


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Monday, February 12, 2007


A few weeks ago, I was complaining that I'd been busting my ass at derby for the last 3 months and hadn't lost one single, solitary, fucking pound...It was pissing me off. I don't like scales, and hadn't weighed myself since.

Last night some of the girls commented that it looked like I'd lost some weight. I just rolled my eyes and said,

"Shyeah, right, whatever."...
and continued on with practice.

When I got home, I stepped on the scale for shits & giggles(forevermore referred to as "shittles"), lo and behold...

I've lost 17 pounds!!

I don't want to sabotage myself by getting to excited about it, though. Because honestly, I'm not doing roller derby to lose weight.

I'm doing it because I like to hit people.

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You are all invited!!

Sunday, February 11, 2007


Thursday, February 08, 2007

Let me guess.....

The lawyer, Howard, gets everything.....

Truth really is stranger than fiction.


Wednesday, February 07, 2007

My dog is addicted to crack

Ass crack, that is.
How come little dogs like to curl up in the crack of your ass when they are under the covers? Usually, Sheena is snuggled up to Hubs, but lately she seems to favor me. Even when I'm curled up on the couch, she will wedge her way into the triangular space between the back of my knees and my butt. If I get up from the couch, she will dive into the space between the cushions, until another butt crack is available. Weird little dog.

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Monday, February 05, 2007

Spam attack

Lately, I've been getting a shitload of spam comments on older posts in HaloScan. I 've deleted and reported them. Anyone else having the same problem? Any suggestions as to what to do about it? Its never been a problem before...before NEW Blogger, that is....coincidence? Very strange, indeed.

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Sunday, February 04, 2007

We made the paper!!

Saturday, February 03, 2007


Thursday, February 01, 2007

Fuck yeah!